Sunday, December 28, 2008
Another Holiday Survived
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Go Spurs!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
The "Saw" Parody Sequence from "Scary Movie 4"
Saturday, December 13, 2008
My Wife Rocks
Monday, December 1, 2008
Another November, Another Novel
Well, actually, finally a novel may be more like it, since my debut effort two years ago (Razor) was really just the first part of a longer (still...ahem...incomplete) project, and last year's effort (The Ending Dream) was never completed, even if I did hit the requisite 50,000 word mark.
This time, however, I actually wrote a novel in November. I'm happy with this one, as it's the first writing work I've actually completed in quite some time, and it somehow managed to incorporate a little something of all of the writing-related ideas that have been floating around in my over-sized head for the past several months. It needs quite a bit of revision and development work, but overall I'd say this one is a keeper...Hell, I even left it open for a sequel...:)
And now for some shameless, somewhat silly ad copy:
something black...
The end has come.
Shadows have risen, and now feed on the living. A dark fog has fallen over the world, spreading madness and chaos wherever it goes. The ghostly highways of America have been abandoned, and the streets of her cities flow with blood.
A small band of survivors -- led by a widowed veteran, a cop and a mysterious woman -- may be the last people left alive on earth. They'll do whatever they can to escape the dark creatures that scour the land, unaware that one of their fellow survivors may hold the key to saving the human race...and that one of them may yet bring the world's doom...
Something evil is coming. Something black...
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Goodbye, Bob
I lost a good friend last night.
Bob, the handsome pug displayed above, came to us not that long ago with his sister/girlfriend/personal assistant/nurse, Bailey. In just a short time, these two brought an unrequited amount of love and warmth into our home with their gentleness, their unassuming ways and their constant need to be held and pet.
Unfortunately for us all, Bob was something of an old man, and last night, after a day just like any other, Bob laid down at my feet while I was in front of the TV and settled down for his final nap.
Bob was about as sweet of a dog and as good a companion as anyone could ever ask for. We'll miss his frumpy, no-nonsense, "Whatever, just pet me, OK?" attitude; we'll miss his wonderfully goofy facial expressions ("Bob's making a funny face", my 6-year-old son would say...he'd also gently extend Bob's ears out and say "Look, Bob is like a wolf!"); and we'll miss his quiet, gentle manner.
The world won't be quite as bright without you, Bob. We'll take care of Bailey, so don't you worry (or, perhaps more accurately, Bailey will take care of us). You just get a good rest, old man, and go with all of our love.
Good bye, Bob.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Long Time, No Blog...
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Another Article Up
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Happy Anniversary, Honey!
I love you, Angel. I always will. Thank you for the best 8 years of my life, and here's to the next 80. :)
Monday, October 13, 2008
New Article is Up!
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
The Noggin' Song
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
I Waited Too Long to Get Into Basketball
Now, with the NBA season right around the corner...oh, wait. No basketball team here. Bummer.
No worries: the Seattle Sonics/Oklahoma City Thunder are at the bottom of my watch list for this season, though I must admit it would have been fun having a local team to root for. CURSE YOU, CLAY BENNETT! MAY YOUR PROSTATE ENLARGE TO UNFATHOMABLE PROPORTIONS!
I'm not sure what fostered this recent interest...growing up, I was about as far removed from interest in sports as one could possibly get. I ran track, briefly, in the 7th grade, where I also participated in lunchtime games of football and soccer, but there's where my sports involvement/interest ended. Now, for reasons i can't completely understand or condone, I've turned into a veritable NBA fiend. I can tell you all about a 3-second defensive violation or sprout off the shooting averages for a good 2-dozen players from last season. I play NBA 2K with my invented Seattle Sonics team every night (just started the season, actually...we had lots of pre-season games to practice...). I grab snippets of highlights from last season on my breaks at work, and I just joined a fantasy league.
What the Hell?
Oh, well, no sense in fighting it, even if my behaviors as I get old(er) do just tend to confuse me.
So, here I sit, anxiously awaiting a sports season to begin with no local team to cheer for, but with no small amount of enthusiasm nevertheless. Go Spurs/Suns/Clippers/Blazers (west) Celtics/Pistons/Cavs/Bulls/Bobcats (east)!
(It's easier to enjoy the games, i find, if you have lots of different teams to support. ;)
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Monday, September 15, 2008
So, It's Only Been A Month Since My Last Blog Post...
I'll summarize:
Work has been H-E-L-L. It began with the auditors annual colonoscopy in August, followed by a number of "emergency" re-orgs, training sessions, and it just never stopped. Having just done someone else's work for a week, I'm now back to another upcoming SOX deadline, several new duties I'm expected to perform starting a few days ago, and a search for an elusive payment on freelance work done 1300 months ago.
We took a vacation, which was awesome, but it feels like we've been sort of "behind" ever since then. Or maybe I'm just behind...not sure. In any case, the kids have started school, DW is starting a side business selling dyed yarn, DDs B-day has come and gone, and my mom's BD is coming up. Plus we now have cable (NBA!), and I've been absorbed into my XBox NBA2K7 game. Again.
We're acquiring 2 more dogs. I'll elaborate more on them once they've visited again, but suffice to say a) they're adorable, and b) they're...REALLY adorable. They'll be visiting this weekend. To prepare for their coming, we've been putting up a fence...which is a lot more fun than it sounds. That's more or less been my activity of choice for the past two weekends.
All in all, it's been a whirlwind, and we haven't even gotten to the "busy" time of year yet....wheeeeeee!
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Summer Is Already Coming to a Close...
* Zoo visits x2 (and more to come, since we bought an annual pass)
* Trip to Michigan to visit DWs family (which itself included a trip to an amusement park, rafting, swimming, and other assorted activities)
* Enough crafts and projects done at home to open our own shop
* DS and I have hit the basketball court on several occasions
* Hikes/walks aplenty
* Northwest Trek (an awesome little photo safari where you view local wildlife)
* Trips to the movie theater (7 for me, 3 for my DD, 2 for each DW and DS)
* Barbecues aplenty
Of course, the quantity of these activities is in long run fairly meaningless; what's important is the question of whether or not we had fun, and I think I have to answer with a resounding "Yes". In fact, this is the most enjoyable summer I can remember in a looooong time, and the only bad thing about *that* is that DW and I have set the bar high for next summer. :)
Enjoy the rest of August, everyone!
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Daezarkian Is Writing Again
It's been way, way, WAAAAAAAY too long since I did some productive writing, so I'm stoked.
While "Darker Sunset" has received its third official rejection, I've been quietly revising the first two books of my so-called horror trilogy, "Razor". That revision is still a work in progress, but that didn't stop me from starting up the long-avoided third installment yesterday during a "break"*. I'm happy to say that I've pumped out 15 pages since yesterday, which is exactly 15 pages more than anything else I've written all year long.
The "Razor" series is sort of hard to describe...it's not quite horror, not quite action, not quite fantasy, but it works awfully hard to incorporate elements of all three while still striving to be as relentlessly gory, offensive and sex-filled as it possibly can be.
"Razor: Angel" is a fairly traditional horror story that follows a pair of professional hit men as they track a vampire from Colorado to Washington and attempt to put an end to her feasting days, only to learn that she is the least of their worries...indeed, as the local sheriff of the lonely northwest town of Ravenwood has come to discover, this vampire may be humanity's only hope.
"Razor: Hell" is two interconnected stories. The first involves an investigative reporter and a government agent who embark on a mission of revenge and find themselves in the middle of a massive supernatural conspiracy that spans across the globe. The alternating story involves an epic journey through a world known as Hell.
"Razor: Serpent" is intended as the climax of the series, and it involves a brutal war between opposing forces that have long vied for control over a source of immense source of mystical power. Where the first book takes place entirely in "the real world" and the second novel spends time both on Earth and in Hell, this third book is a more fantasy-style story set entirely in a dark, fictional world.
So there you go. You may never get to read them, but this series has for the past couple of years greatly revitalized my writing habits. Because of that, the least I owe to the story and these characters is to finish their tale.
* Break = Any moment or moments spent avoiding real work, while still typing furiously and looking furtively at the screen so as to deceive one's supervisor into thinking they are doing an outstanding job.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Random Music Video of the Week
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Help: I'm In Michigan and I Can't Get Up!
DS and I have enjoyed shooting some hoops outside, while everyone got to go and catch a movie last night after a fun dinner out. Today we're going to go and hit the DW's aunt's house for dinner, and tomorrow we're going to an amusement park. And none of this stuff was even on the brochure!
I am pleased to say that I have not thought about work once since we've arrived (until now, where the thought of work arrived only long enough for me to realize that I hadn't thought of it...) Unfortunately, eventually, I'll have to go back and feed the work demons a bit more of a soul, but for the next few days I'm going to continue to enjoy the first true vacation I've taken in years. :)
Cheers!
Friday, July 11, 2008
My Favorite George Carlin Routine
RIP, George
Monday, July 7, 2008
A Very Brief Summary of Summer Films Seen to Date
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
***
(previously reviewed)
The Incredible Hulk
**1/2
Hulk smashes, and he smashes well. A nicely paced first half devolves into a too-long finale where computerized monsters whack each other endlessly. Norton is good as Banner, and Tim Roth once again proves he's a great villain. Loud, cheesy summer fun.
Wanted
***
Still not a fan of McAvoy, and the whole thing was a bit too far in the Funny Nihilism filmmaking camp, but this visually stunning film is never dull and has more action, explosions and logic-defying stunts packed into its 110 minutes than all three Matrix films combined. Morgan Freeman has some wickedly memorable lines; I'll never think of looms the same again; and Angelina Jolie looks good nekkid.
Hancock
***1/2
Unjustly panned by critics everywhere, Hancock is a tightly paced, efficient superhero flick with loads of attitude, humor and a surprising amount of heart. The film doesn't have the most airtight of plots, I grant you, but the excellent direction, energetic performances and eye-popping production values more than overcome the films few shortcomings. Will Smith is the man. Peter Berg is rapidly becoming one of my favorite directors. My favorite summer movie so far.
The Dark Knight
(coming soon...like, say, when it's released)
Thursday, July 3, 2008
It's hard to blog...
It's been a busy week at work here, and the family is just gearing up for the 4th, and we're also getting ready for our big trip to Michigan to visit my in-laws at the end of the month. Have a safe and happy Independence Day (watch out for the aliens), and, if you're lucky (or unlucky) I'll have something more substantial to blab about next week.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Plurking is Fun!
http://plurk.com/redeemByURL?from_uid=2539915&check=-1736699578&s=1
Monday, June 23, 2008
Wanted R-Rated Trailer
Again, note the R-rating: this trailer gets bloody and features Morgan Freeman dropping an F-Bomb. You've been warned.
The Death of a Legend
Here's a nice article about him.
Take it easy, George, we'll miss ya!
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
The Zen of Sarcasm
1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.
12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Best Father's Day Weekend...EVAR!
It was a wonderful, relaxing weekend. I'm fairly certain I don't deserve a family this great...;)
I Love You Guys!
Thursday, June 12, 2008
New DDM Article Is Up
In other (WotC-related) news, my Tiefling Warlock Lucan Keth (also a character from my "Crown of Blood" novels) finally returned to Mike Mearls' lunchtime D&D 4.0 game today, and kicked some serious tail!
(Note to the rest of the party...next time, let's bring some Fighters...)
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
The Big Book Is Off to DAW...
Wish me luck!
Monday, June 9, 2008
Friday, June 6, 2008
My Horrific Day (Summarized in the Form of a Movie Trailer)
It drones on....and on....and on....
("I have a bad feeling about this...")
It emphasizes the same point over
and over
and over again!
("We have a situation! I repeat, we have a situation!")
It points the finger...
("Watch out!")
...at everyone else!
(screams)
It sucks the life out of you, and leaves nothing in its wake!
("Oh God, no! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!")
It's...
THE MEETING
In a meeting...no one can hear you scream.*
*That's because all of the oxygen in the room has been sucked away by a ceaseless tirade of jargon, thus depriving you of the air needed to scream properly.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
I Kick Arse At Virtual Basketball
I also just finished watching the Rifftrax version of Predator, and laughed my a$$ off. I'm a big fan of the movie, but Mike Nelson's treatment of the Governator made me see the film in an entirely new light.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Nice "Spoof" on Youtube Commentary
http://blog.rifftrax.com/2008/05/29/stupid-comments-wanted/
A special nod to Mike for making use of a knitting video. :)
Movie Review: Indiana Jones & the City of the Crystal Skull
Indiana Jones & the Kingdom of the Crytsal Skull
Starring: Harrison Ford, Shia LeBeouf, Cate Blanchett, Karen Allen, Ray Winstone, John Hurt, Jim Broadbent
Directed by Steven Spielberg
Rating: ***
I will admit to having approached Indy's latest outing from the "cautious camp": while I was excited that Indy 4 was finally being made, it was pretty clear that there was no real need to make the film apart from satiating fan desires (and, of course, to make money, because it turns out that Spielberg, Lucas and Ford are quite poor...) That being said, my expectations were low, so I was pleasantly surprised to find this latest outing -- which pits whip-cracking, wise-cracking archaeologist/adventurer Henry "Indiana" Jones (Ford) against the KPG, South American natives and a horde of special effects -- an enjoyable, if somewhat familiar romp.
After a rollicking chase sequence through the fabled "Area 51" in the scene's opening sequence in 1957 -- wherein Indy and his partner Mac (Winstone) are harassed by a KPG super spy Irina Spalko (Blanchett) and her minions -- Indy finds himself pulled along with a young biker named Mutt (LeBeouf, displaying a surprising amount of charisma) in a quest to track down a fellow archaeologist, Oxley (Hurt). This quest takes Indy into some unfamiliar territory when the truth of what "Ox" discovered, and what it could mean if that discovery falls into Russian hands.
Let's break it down simply:
What worked:
* Ford still kicks a$$ as Indy, even after all of these years. The cadence of his performance is a bit different, but once you fall into step with "Indy senior" it's easy to stay on track with him through the rest of the film.
* Karen Allen still kicks similar a$$ as Marion, and the scenes between she and Ford are wonderful.
* Blanchett as the villain. Spalko may be fairly generic, but Blanchett infuses her with acerbic wit and real menace. She's easily the best villain in the series since Tot in the original Raiders.
* LeBeouf. I hate to admit it, but he was a nice addition to the film, and if LeBeouf can keep himself out of trouble I think he has a very promising future in Hollywood.
* The setting/theme. Some people will be bothered by where Indy 4 winds up, but it all worked for me. As the film is set in 1957, Lucas and Spielberg really play up the pulp aspects of the period, plumbing through their collection of "Amazing Stories" magazines with aplomb: the Red Scare, Area 51, Roswell, fear of nuclear weapons and a general sense of paranoia all find their way happily into the film.
What didn't work:
* Too much CGI. I'm not a fan of CGI in the first place, but I can forgive moderate, effective use. It had no place in a series known for its groundbreaking stunt work; Spielberg relied on it far too heavily, particularly in the film's centerpiece action chase (which was good, but it would've been better if it wasn't so painfully obvious it was all taking place on a green screen).
* Ray Winstone's "Mac". There was nothing wrong with Winstone's performance, but in addition to being a flat character there just doesn't seem to be much use for him at all -- he doesn't contribute to the plot, doesn't provide any strong conflict, and in the end even vanishes in a fairly low-key fashion in a scene that might as well have been lifted from "The Mummy".
Overall, this was a fun film, and for the sheer spectacle worth seeing in the theater (provided you can avoid paying full price, unlike myself).
With any luck, I'll catch "Hancock" here in a few weeks, and "The Dark Knight" after that. In the meantime, next up I'll post some actual "writing" on my so-called "writing blog".
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Busy, Busy, Busy
Now, to make one thing real clear...I don't get out to the movies all that often. And when I say "all that often", I mean...well, not at all. Between the excessive cost of going to the movies, the difficulty in finding baby-sitting, and the relative speed and ease with which one can get movies after they come out on DVD (or Blu-Ray, or whatever your choice of home media is during this so-called "format war"), I've more or less given up on going to the theater, especially when faced with a summer movie season like that forced on the movie-going public back in 2007 ("Revenge of the Threequels!"). This year, however...well, I may just have to get up off my lazy butt and drag someone along to the theater with me, as there are some tasty treats on the horizon.
Here's a breakdown of the major studio releases for the 2008 summer movie season, as presented by the good folks over at Rotten Tomatoes:
Major Summer Releases 2008
May 2
Iron Man
Director: Jon Favreau (Elf, Zathura)
Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Terrence Howard, Gwyneth Paltrow, Jeff Bridges
My Thoughts: I wasn't excited about this one until I saw the trailer, at which point I became understandably intrigued. Iron Man's massive success thus far, coupled with fantastic reviews and overall good word-of-mouth, makes me think I may need to go and pay the Iron Dude a visit.
May 9
Speed Racer
Director: Larry & Andy Wachowski (The Matrix Trilogy)
Starring: Emile Hirsch, Christina Ricci, John Goodman, Susan Sarandon, Matthew Fox
My Thoughts: After seeing the trailer, my thoughts were that this film could either be really good, or it could just suck. Public opinion and reviews have been leaning towards the latter, but I may still give this one a once-over once it comes out on DVD. (If nothing else, it should have good Rifftrax potential...)
May 16
The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
Director: Andrew Adamson (Shrek, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe)
Starring: Georgie Henley, William Moseley, Anna Popplewell, Ben Barnes, Warwick Davis
My Thoughts: Ho-hum. The first Chronicles of Narnia was entertaining, but far from one of my favorite films. I've heard generally positive things about the sequel, however, so I'll give it a shot somewhere down the line.
May 22
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Director: Steven Spielberg (Jurassic Park, Saving Private Ryan, Munich)
Starring: Harrison Ford, Shia LaBeouf, Cate Blanchett, Karen Allen, Ray Winstone, Jim Broadbent
My Thoughts: I'm excited about this one (and ashamed that I missed my opportunity to pre-screen it earlier this week). While the reviews have been mixed, so long as Spielberg, Ford & company are operating at even 50% efficacy, it's bound to be a blast. This might be one to actually sneak off and go see while it's hot.
May 30
Sex and the City
Director: Michael Patrick King
Starring: Sarah Jessica Parker, Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon, Jennifer Hudson
My Thoughts: Never seen the show, never wanted to. Pass.
June 6
Kung Fu Panda
Director: Mark Osborne & John Stevenson
Starring: Jack Black, Dustin Hoffman, Angelina Jolie, Jackie Chan, Lucy Liu, Ian McShane
My Thoughts: The DW is excited about this one. I think it could be fun, especially with the impressive vocal cast, but based on the trailer, I'm not sure I'll rush out to see it.
You Don't Mess with the Zohan
Director: Dennis Dugan (Saving Silverman, The Benchwarmers, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry)
Starring: Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, Alex Luria, Emmanuelle Chriqui
My Thoughts: This one has potential. It looks pretty stupid, to be completely honest, an "old school" Adam Sandler flick, before he went all soft and mushy. I actually prefer the "newer" Sandler films, however, but I'll still Netflix this one down on the line, as the premise is pretty fun and the trailer cracks me up.
June 13
The Happening
Director: M. Night Shyamalan (The Sixth Sense, Signs, The Village)
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Spencer Breslin
My Thoughts: Oh. Yeah. Shamalyan has disappointed with his last couple of films (I still get pi$$ed when I think about The Village), but I won't forget that he's the guy that gave us Unbreakable and Signs. The Happening has real potential, and the fact that it bears an "R" rating indicates that Night is moving into even darker territory than he has in the past, which is saying something considering the grim nature of his films. I'm very interested to check this one out.
The Incredible Hulk
Director: Louis Leterrier (The Transporter, Unleashed)
Starring: Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, Tim Roth, William Hurt, Tim Blake Nelson
My Thoughts: This is one of the weaker comic book film offerings that the summer has to offer, but even then, it looks intriguing. The trick will be to see if Norton & his impressive ensemble supporting cast are able to make this "new Hulk" a) not as artsy and pretentious as Ang Lee's Hulk, and b) not just another superhero movie. The previews haven't done a lot for me, but I'll still be willing to give it a try, if for no other reason than to see Norton, Tyler, Hurt and Roth all in the same film.
June 20
Get Smart
Director: Peter Segal (Anger Management, 50 First Dates)
Starring: Steve Carell, Anne Hathaway, Dwayne Johnson, Terence Stamp, Alan Arkin
My Thoughts: I have high hopes for this one. Get Smart was a favorite show of mine as a kid, and while the movie will necessarily drift from the series (as it should), this movie has some great comic potential, especially with the inspired choice of supporting players. I'll keep my fingers crossed for this one.
June 27
Wanted
Director: Timur Bekmambetov (Night Watch, Day Watch)
Starring: James McAvoy, Morgan Freeman, Angelina Jolie, Common
My Thoughts: Meh. The least-inspired comic book film of the summer. Matrix-looking people doing Matrix-like things. I may be wrong (I know that DW thought this one looked good), but if the marketing campaign for this one just continues to show me that Hunted is going to be another Matrix-light, I'll have to pass.
Wall*E
Director: Andrew Stanton (A Bug's Life, Finding Nemo)
Starring: Fred Willard, Jeff Garlin, Ben Burtt
My Thoughts: You pretty much can't go wrong with Pixar. Some of their efforts (Toy Story 2, Monsters, Inc., The Incredibles, Finding Nemo) are better than others (Cars, Bug's Life, Ratatouille), but even a "bad" Pixar film is better than 90% of the other animated fare out there. And Fred Willard rules.
July 2
Hancock
Director: Peter Berg (The Rundown, Friday Night Lights, The Kingdom)
Starring: Will Smith, Charlize Theron, Jason Bateman
My Thoughts: Woot. I was mixed on this one at first, but after learning that Peter Berg was at the helm and having viewed the second trailer, I'm all over it. Sure, it's a super-hero movie, and somewhat in the vein of Mystery Men, but it looks damned entertaining. Another one I may have to sneak out and see rather than waiting for the DVD.
July 11
Hellboy II: The Golden Army
Director: Guillermo del Toro (Blade II, Hellboy, Pan's Labyrinth)
Starring: Ron Perlman, Selma Blair, Doug Jones, Luke Goss, Thomas Kretschmann
My Thoughts: This will be fun. Hellboy wasn't a major favorite of mine, but it was still entertaining and accomplished what it set out to. Del Toro is a talented director and Pearlman is always a pleasure to watch, no matter the role, so this will easily find its way into my Netflix cue.
July 18
The Dark Knight
Director: Christopher Nolan (Memento, Batman Begins, The Prestige)
Starring: Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Morgan Freeman, Michael Caine, Gary Oldman, Aaron Eckhart, Maggie Gyllenhaal
My Thoughts: Double woot. Probably the film I most eagerly look forward to this year (edging out Hancock and Indy, who make up numbers 2 and 3). The previews have just confirmed what most everyone has guessed: this movie is going to kick some proverbial a$$.
Mama Mia!
Director: Phyllia Lloyd
Starring: Meryl Streep, Chrinte Baranski, Julie Walter, Amanda Seyfried, Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, Stellan Skarsgard
My Thoughts: This looks like fun. I'm not what I'd call an Abba fan, but I've heard good things about the show, the casting is fun, and musicals are always fun.
July 25
Step Brothers
Director: Adam McKay (Anchorman, Talladega Nights)
Starring: Will Ferrell, John C. Reilly, Richard Jenkins, Mary Steenburgen, Adam Scott
My Thoughts: Pass. Will Ferrell is very hit or miss for me. My favorite films of his have been Stranger Than Fiction (where he played things straight and was backed by a highly original story and a stellar supporting cast), and The Producers (where he had only a minor role). This may prove to be a terribly funny movie, but it's not one I'll be lining up to see in any format.
The X Files
Director: Chris Carter (The X Files)
Starring: David Duchovny, Gillian Anderson, Amanda Peet, Xzibit, Billy Connolly
My Thoughts: Pass. Was never really into the show, and I can't imagine the new film would make a lot of sense to me...though the supporting cast is interesting. (Wonder if Billy Connelly's character will get killed, like they do in 99% of his other movies...)
August 1
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
Director: Rob Cohen (Fast and the Furious, xXx, Stealth)
Starring: Brendan Fraser, Maria Bello, Jet Li, Michelle Yeoh, Luke Ford
My Thoughts: Could be fun. I'm not a huge fan of director Rob Cohen, and, while I like Maria Bello, I'm sad to see that Rachel Weisz has stepped out of her role as Edie. Regardless, the trailer is fun, Brendan Frasier is reliably fun to watch, and Jet Li is a great villain. Should be good, brainless fun.
August 8
Pineapple Express
Director: David Gordon Green (George Washington, All the Real Girls, Snow Angels)
Starring: Seth Rogen, James Franco, Amber Heard
My Thoughts: This looks damn funny. Seth Rogen is turning out to be a popular comic actor, and James Franco can be good given the right role. I'll Netflix this one, for sure.
August 15
Tropic Thunder
Director: Ben Stiller (Zoolander)
Starring: Ben Stiller, Robert Downey Jr., Jack Black, Nick Nolte, Brandon T. Jackson
My Thoughts: I'm mixed on this one....it could either be extremely funny, or just flat-out lame. The trailers have me leaning towards the former, but I'll need to see a bit more before I commit any money towards this one.
Ok...a much longer post than I thought. Time to get back to work (and see if I can't come up with a creative way to get to some of these movies...)
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
Weekend Sailing (or, Why My Wife is So Friggin Awesome)
This weekend, she sent me on a day-long sailing class. I'd looked into sailing very briefly a few weeks ago, more as sort of a whimsical "wouldn't that be cool" sort of a thing. And lo and behold, before I know it, I'm in a class learning the 56,438 different nautical terms that identify the little metal piece on the front end of the foresail, getting confused by the physics of tacking versus jibing, and then I'm out on the water, hoisting the mainsail, adjusting the traveler and grinding the foresail lines. What a day! I'm going to look more into sailing, now, I think (as well as *ahem* learning to swim), because the entire day was just a blast.
We followed up with a very tiring Mother's Day, which started with breakfast provided by my wife's new rice cooker and that culminated in dinner at my mom's. All in all a fun (but exhausting) weekend.
And, to recap...my wife rules. Eat that, "other" wives!!!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Zombies!
Are you?
This is something that requires serious attention, I think. Sure, you may be prepared for a break in...or a flood...hell, even the possibility of a volcanic eruption might not rattle you in the slightest. But can anyone out there seriously tell me that they're ready for ZOMBIES???!!!
I didn't think so.
I'll be the first to (reluctantly) admit that my own house is far from zombie proof. The wall of big windows in the living room is just screaming for aggressive ghouls to come crashing through, and in the event of an overrun of hostile zombies we'd be forced to retreat to roof in order to keep ourselves safe. Luckily, however, the DW created stocked us up on emergency supplies a few years ago, and my extensive knowledge of zombies will of course prove to be a great benefit, and while we may possess only a modicum of firepower, we have plenty of improvisational weapons that have proven their worth against zombies in popular media.
There is no better weapon than being prepared, so while I zombie-proof my residence and you consider what needs to be done to better prepare yourself for a Romeroesque apocalypse, consider this resource to help get you pointed in the right direction: The National Center for Reanimation Prevention and Control (NCRPC).
This gold mine of information will make hardened zombie killers out of even the wimpiest citizens. Be prepared, citizens -- you never know when that rage virus will strike!
(Please note that my tongue is planted firmly in cheek here. Also be aware, however, that being prepared for a zombie invasion is, in many ways, like preparing for any major disaster, and it certainly never hurts to be prepared. The excellent book The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead, besides being a terribly fun read, also provides plenty of great real life tips on how to be prepared for any big emergency, whether that be a fallout, hostile takeover at the hands of Canadians, or the much more likely event of a zombie uprising).
Good zombie hunting!
Monday, April 21, 2008
Busy Times & Scary Trailers
Well, it's been a busy month. My DS had his tonsils out (poor guy is on a largely liquid diet for another week or so), I've shifted locations here at work (window seat = Yay!; next to boss = BOO!), we finally got the dog spayed (she was thrilled, I assure you), and I helped my dear Mom move into her new house. (I didn't do much, to be honest, aside from eat those yummy Costco sandwiches and make pithy comments.) All this while my dearly beloved British overlord of a VP assigned me a very unenviable task during the one week I had little choice but to miss half of my days at work, which led to an extremely long Friday (when everyone else is normally gone) and a very tired late night Sunday as I finished everything up.
So. Fun.
But in the meantime, I've seen some more movies!
For reasons that aren't entirely clear to anyone (myself included), roughly once a year I get on a bizarre horror movie kick that lasts for about 2-3 weeks. (I do the same thing with rap music.) I've always been a fan of well made horror films, but the recent trend that Hollywood has taken with the production of "torture porn" (horror films that revolve around the sadistic mutilation and degradation of others; these victims are normally captives, and the perpetrator is generally not a supernatural entity, but rather just a weirdo) put me off just a bit. While "Saw" may be a fine movie, I'm fairly certain it didn't warrant 3 (soon 4) sequels. "Wolf Creek" could never have been made and I'd have been happy. The same goes for "Hostel" and its sequel, and even the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes".
Recently, however, I was lucky enough to discover a trio of excellent films that are all scary, well made, well acted, and that use as their staple villains three old favorites from back when horror stories were still in their infancy: vampires, werewolves, and zombies! Without going into detail, just check out the trailers below, and know that all three films are worth catching on Netflix (I've actually purchased 2 of the 3, as well, and I don't buy movies nearly as often as I used to).
While all of these films are unquestionably violent, they are all also genuinely scary, peopled with well-developed characters, and enjoyable to watch. My personal favorite of the three was "28 Days Later", which I've already watched twice and that bears images and scenes that have lingered long in my memory after viewing (so much so that the film is the second by Danny Boyle to make it onto my own personal "top 10" list, which just reached 11 films....time to shift something off, I guess...)
30 Days of Night (Vampires):
My thoughts: 3 out of 4 stars. Handsomely made, very scary film that manages to actually make vampires scary again. I've decided that I like Josh Hartnett as an actor, especially in these types of roles (he was also fun in "The Faculty"). "30 Days of Night" does a lot of things right, and even though it has its share of problems (there are plot holes the size of pot holes, and anyone who still believes that the light in Alaska works as depicted here and in films like "Insomnia" should probably have their head closely examined), the film is overall highly enjoyable, and a great Halloween treat.
28 Days Later (zombies):
My thoughts: 4 out of 4 stars. One of my new favorite films. Atmospheric, well acted (Cillian Murphy and Brendan Gleeson, especially, are awesome), directed and executed, and very, very frightening from start to finish. While not technically a "zombie" movie in the strictest sense of the word, I'm not really sure what else to classify it as...the one classification I have come up with, "A Post Apocalyptic Infected Ghouls on Speed Film", is just sort of a mouthful.
"28 Days Later" is a difficult movie to forget, and not an easy one to step away from once it has you in its hold. It's a rare horror film that is much more than the sum of its parts: at times exciting, at times touching, oft terrifying, and always engaging. All in a all it's a great film that just all around kicks arse. See it...now.
Dog Soldiers (werewolves):
My thoughts: 3 out of 4 stars. Great, gory fun. The direction is clunky at times, and there truly is nothing original going on here, but the movie is so well crafted that I found myself not worried about that in the least. The movie is also surprisingly funny, often at the most shocking of times...I think it's a British thing...
That's it for now -- take care!
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Movie Reviews, Because.....Well, Because!
I don't normally review movies, but for no real valid reason I've been getting back into watching films again, so I thought I'd share my thoughts on some of the movies I've viewed recently (by choice or otherwise...)
Note: On the very rare occasion that I review a movie, I use a fairly standard best out of 4 star ratings (1 = sucks, 2 = average, 3 = good, 4 = perfect), with the option for using half-star ratings, as well. I tend to judge a movie based on a) how well it accomplishes what it sets out to accomplish, and b) how much I enjoyed it. That being said, there will be some films I give favorable reviews that many may consider to be "crap" movies, and there will be some popular films that I give poor ratings. Luckily for you, I don't see movies until they come out on DVD these days, so what I'm reviewing is going to be limited to what's been in our Netflixcue and what the family has recently acquired as gifts or purchases.
That being said, on to the reviews, presented here in alphabetical order:
"Death Sentence"
2007, Directed by James Wan, starring Kevin Bacon, Kelly Preston, Garrett Hedlund, Aisha Taylor & John Goodman
Rating: **1/2
While the box office and critical results have been dubious, I'm pleased to see that members of the so-called "splat pack" of up and coming horror directors are branching out and trying different things. Doomsday is at the top of my "want to see" list at the moment, and that films recent release inspired me to check out Death Sentence, James Wan's follow-up to his incredibly popular Saw. In Death Sentence, which is loosely based on a novel by Brian Garfield (author of Death Wish, an excellent 1972 film which has the unfortunate honor of being remade sometime next year), mild-mannered executive Nick Hume (Bacon) is pulled out of his seemingly idyllic life by the murder of his son at the hands of a ruthless street gang as part of an initiation ritual. When Nick realizes that the young killer is unlikely to get the punishment he deserves, Nick refuses to testify, thereby allowing the killer go free so that Nick can administer his own justice through murder. Unfortunately for Nick, this revenge killing only brings the attention of the gang's leader (Hedlund), who declares war on Nick's family. Much blood ensues.
I'll be the first to admit that there is little in the way of originality in Death Sentence: if you've even seen a revenge flick or vigilante film, you can most likely guess what's going to happen and when. The overall plot of the film is highly improbable, and the narrative flow is clunky and oft times unbelievable.
Now, that being said, you may wonder why I gave it an above-average rating.
First off, while the film's overall narrative arc is unrealistic, the reason this deficiency draws so much attention is because of how well the film's little moments work. The details in many scenes lend a sense of realism and credulity to the story, enough that I was taken in very early in the proceedings and found myself unable to stop watching even as the story grew somewhat preposterous. The montage of family home videos at the beginning of the film are a fine example: generally in films this device is excessively cheesy and ultimately unbelievable, but here the footage felt very real, and I think fulfilled its job in establishing a snapshot of the Hume family without drowning the audience in saccharine. Nick's hesitation prior to committing his first vigilante murder, and his subsequent reaction after the deed is done; his early hand-to-hand battles; his ineptitude in the art of purchasing and handling firearms....all of these moments are so well handled that they make the film enjoyable even when the plot takes a short walk off of the cliffs of reality. Much of the efficacy of these scenes is a result of Kevin Bacon's excellent performance and Wan's sure-handed direction.
From an action perspective, Death Sentence contains more than its share of well-staged sequences, particularly a chase scene that culminates in a struggle atop a parking garage and a a bloody shootout in an old hospital for the film's climax. Wan is very adept at crafting tension, and while his work does come across as somewhat derivative (the ending shootout, in particular, echoes the climax of Taxi Driver), it is efficiently staged. Horror fans expecting Wan's trademark extreme violence will likely be a bit disappointed, but the film is still heavy on the bloodshed, more so than typical action fare (though I do wish that directors would stop relying on CGI-enhanced gore effects...it just looks silly.)
What struck me most about Death Sentence -- and this is likely the ultimate source of the 2-and-a-half star rating -- is how perfectly Wan establishes and maintains the movie's grim tone, to the point where I wish he'd have helmed the recent Punisher film in lieu of Jonathan Hensleigh. Wan has a good understanding of what makes a revenge tale such as this work.
"Music & Lyrics"
2007, Directed by Marc Lawrence, starring Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore, Brad
Garrett, Haley Bennett & Campbell Scott
Rating: ***
Ever since college, I've become something of a fan of romantic comedies. There are good ones and bad ones, naturally, and it can oft times be difficult to know until it's far too late. Good ones, for me, include Love Actually, While You Were Sleeping, 50 First Dates, The Wedding Singer, and the cream of the crop, When Harry Met Sally. The bad ones...well, suffice to say there are a lot. I'm happy to say, however, that Music & Lyrics falls into the category of "the good ones".
There isn't much new or original being presented here, but the story we're given works, primarily due to the chemistry, comedy and charisma of its two leads. Alex Fletcher (Grant) is a has-been pop icon of the 80s (the movie opens with a hilariously over-the-top music video from his heyday, which somehow manages to combine all of the tacky wonderfulness of every one of my favorite electro-pop 80s music stars into a 3 and a half minute package) who makes his living now living in the shadow of his former band mate, indulging his own whims and playing the carnival and fairs circuit, where his old fans (once teen aged, hormonally charged girls, now middle-aged, hormonally charged mothers and housewives) flock to see him. A chance for a return to stardom presents itself in the form of a Britney/Shakira-like po-star Cora Corman (Bennett), who would like to give him a comeback opportunity with a duet with her on her new album...if he can compose a song for her in just under a week. Despite the enthusiasm of his manager (Garrett, as funny as ever), Fletcher hasn't written any new material in over a decade, and he has no lyricist to work with. Luckily for him, aid comes in the unlikely form of his substitute plant lady, Sophie Fisher (Barrymore), who has a natural talent for poetry and lyrics. Much comedy and the inevitable love ensues.
What I liked most about Music & Lyrics, besides Grant's inimitable ability to deliver one liner after one liner with deadpan assurance, is the fact that the film never pushes the "cute" or "saccharine" aspects of the story too far, and instead lets the story unfold naturally. The inevitable complications that always arise in the third act of films such as this are not (surprisingly) the result of a mis-perception of an old flame that resurfaces for either of the leads, but instead a very natural (if somewhat quirky) conflict that arises over the fate of their joint artistic venture. Naturally, everything works out ok in the end (not to give anything away), and the movie leaves you with a nice, happy feeling, just as a film like this should.
If you're a fan of Hugh Grant movies, or Drew Barrymore movies, or just well-made romantic comedies, there's plenty to like here. (And if Hugh Grant's line about how his tight pants make him a more sensitive person doesn't force you to burst out laughing, there's probably something wrong with you....)
"Sunshine"
2007, Directed by Danny Boyd, starring Cillian Murphy, Chris Evans, Rose
Byrne, Cliff Curtis, Michelle Yeoh, Hiroyuki Sanada, Troy Garity & Benedict
Wong
Rating: ***1/2
I may be one of the only self-proclaimed "film geeks" to have never seen a film by Danny Boyle before now. I've read the reviews, certainly, and I was even moderately interested in watching Trainspotting after having read the book in college; additionally, being a zombie fan, 28 Days Later has been on my "gotta watch this" list for about 3 decades. But, for whatever reason, I've never actually had the opportunity to sit down and watch one of Boyle's films, and this one might have gotten skipped over, as well, as it not been for a) a great trailer (which caused it to get added to my Netflix cue), and b) a slip-up on my part that bumped Sunshine to the top of my Netflix cue. I'm happy for the mistake.
Sunshine is a stylish, atmospheric, and tense science fiction film that places a surprising amount of emphasis on the science aspect of things (which is a lot more than most sci-fi films made these days tend to do) and less on crafting a stereotypical Hollywood-style sci-fi film. That said, the final 1/2 hour of Sunshine does stray into more typical thriller territory (a fact that all but condemned the film in many critics eyes), but even with this shift in tone "Sunshine" is a thoroughly enjoying, at times nail-biting experience.
The film is set roughly 50 years in the future. Our sun is dying, so a last-ditch effort to rekindle the star is in order. The mission is undoubtedly suicide: the 8-person crew of the Icarus II must transport a massive explosive device close enough to the sun that it can essentially reignite the sun from within, which means almost certain doom for the cosmonauts involved. The real trouble begins when, at the advice of Capa (Murphy), the engineer who designed the bomb to be delivered to the sun, the Icarus II diverts its course to investigate a distress call. If Capa's hunch is correct, answering the distress call can reward the crew with something that might be vital to their mission; if he is wrong, he may doom their mission altogether.
One thing that struck me about Sunshine is the level of realism: everything about the ship, the crew, and the mission bears the sharp ring of truth. The tension in the film (at least until the last 1/2 hour) stems from the difficulty inherent in something as taken for granted (in sci films, at least) as changing course. Putting on a space suit to make repairs or board another vessel is no simple task, but a major, potentially deadly undertaking. And even the most noble-hearted people may act in unpredictable ways when placed in a situation where not only their own lives are in danger, but those of the entire world.
For a relatively low budget film, Sunshine's special effects are remarkable, and Boyle's direction is sure-handed and (with some exceptions) doesn't draw too much attention to itself, even when conjuring such memorable images as the brightness of the observation deck or a massive fire viewed through glass walls. The performances are all excellent: there are no action heroes here, but scientists, engineers and astronauts placed in a desperate situation. We get to know only as much about the characters as we need to know, which is another refreshing touch to the film: there are no unnecessary flashbacks or secrets from the past to muddle the screenplay, just a fairly straightforward and exciting tale about a small group of people determined to save their world.
Late film shift in tone notwithstanding, Sunshine left an indelible impression on me, such that it has joined the dubious but exclusive echelon of films that I count as my favorites.
That's it for now (phew). I'll review some more films soon, probably some horror films that I've acquired from Netflix (30 Days of Night and 28 Days Later are both on my immediate list).
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Birthday Burgers, Proximate Relatives, Revision Deadline
Happy birthday to my son, who turns the ripe old age of 6 today! We spent the day having doughnuts with his class, visiting Burger King and Toys R' Us, and later playing with various bits of birthday-related booty and growing large on Alton Brown's "manly" sliders, homemade sweet potato fries and dark chocolate cake. All in all, a great time. ;)
I find myself going in cycles when it comes to food. Every time I get serious about trying to get fit and lose weight, I somehow wind up consuming my body weight in burgers and not getting to work out at all over the course of an entire week. I have somehow managed to lose roughly 7 pounds since the end of February (an accomplishment I am very proud of), but since I haven't worked out at all this week and ate at Burger King today, I think I may be back down to having lost only 2 pounds....but oh, well.
My Mom is moving to town, which will be fun: my wife and I have been trying to get our parents to move out to Washington since we arrived some 4 1/2 years ago. (Since my mom is getting here before hers, I'm pretty sure the DW owes me a plush banana.) My brother-in-law will also be coming into town for about a week: it'll be nice to have a fellow rivet-head* about.
In the meantime, various tax returns, company bonuses and funds from article writing have given us a nice financial push; my children continue to demand more attention and care than actually exists in the known universe; and my wife is as beautiful as ever. I'm hard (mostly hard) at work revising "Darker Sunset", with a self-imposed deadline of September 15th of this year. We'll see..it would be very nice to get the revision/type-up done once and for all so that I can actually work on getting this damned thing published.
*A rivethead is someone that listens to Industrial Music, particularly aggro-industrial music. If you actually needed to read this footnote, consider yourself lame.
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
RIP Gary Gygax
Thanks, Gary -- and I wish you nothing but natural 20s at that big gaming table in the sky.
http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/welcome
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Movie Clip: The Wild Bunch (Final Shootout)
(WARNING: This clip contains graphic violence, and a higher bodycount than most Schwarzeneggar films.)
Sunday, February 17, 2008
Sick & Sunny Day
And then, against all odds, DS turned out to be quite sick. The poor guy had trouble keeping any food down, so instead of the afore-planned day outdoors we hung out and watched more shows, hoping to get the little guy feeling like a winner again (and intermittantly cleaning up his inability to hold down so much as a glass of water). In the midst of this, our durned dog made a run for it while my DW was off at the store getting food supplies for dinner, so my DD and I took turns trying to the fetch said canine while the other stayed with the ittle boy. Luckily, my DD found success and returned the dog home; I, on the other hand, only got a faceful of gravel, two scraped hands and what I believe is a disloctaed right thumb. Oh, the joy!
But the day was actually pretty good. The little man sat with me and we surfed Youtube for a while, and he seemed to be feeling almost up to specs by the time he went to bed. The Wife made some truly fantastic homemade chicken noodle soup and brought home some fun shows from the library. And my DD, having finally re-acquired her DVD player after nearly two months of being grounded, has once again vanished into the black pit known as "her room".
Among the many, many, many kid-friendly videos that my son and I watched on Youtube, we managed to stumble across this:
I remember waiting around on Saturday mornings with a blank tape in the VCR ready to tape this one if it ever came on during Saturday Morning Cartoons...and now, finally, after over twenty years, the wait is over. Ain't technology great?
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Friday, February 1, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Make My Day
Mr. Brown
If you've watched the Food Network, then chances are you've heard of Alton Brown, an extraordinarily entertaining guy with his own show ("Good Eats"), a host of books and one of the most creative and innovative presentation styles you've even see on a cooking show. If you think of Rachel Ray or Paula Dean when you think cooking shows, you should give Alton a try...I've never seen anyone else make use of Ken dolls, football plays or sock puppets in their recipe presentations. Alton is fun because he shows us how to make better versions of the foods that a lot of us grew up on or love to eat and feel guilty about (pizza, burgers, cake, cookies...stuff like that...), and shows us ways to prepare them that are both a) new and unique, and b) oddly familiar and traditional. Essentially, he's presenting "high food snob" ways to prepare corn dogs and donuts, which, in my book, is just awesome.
(As a side note, I'd like to mention that "Good Eats" is one of my 5-year-old son's most oft requested shows to watch. It's also the reason that he's always in the kitchen, trying to add "2 cups of flour" and "1 cup of sugar" to anything and everything that is being prepared for any given meal. My son's enthusiasm for Alton's show is also why he and I prepared peanut butter waffles this weekend, and why we had chocolate waffles on Christmas morning...after all, the episode "The Waffle Truth" is one of his all-time favorite things to watch. How many 5-year-old's do you know who are obsessed with a cooking show?)
Recently, my DW located a second show of Alton's called "Feasting on Asphalt", an enormously entertaining chronicle of Alton's motorcycle trek from one end of the continental U.S. to the other, tasting non-franchised, "mom & pop" food every step of the way. Alton & his crew took the back roads of America to, quite literally, get a taste of Americana..and man, did it make me hungry. From cracklin' cornbread to the swinging steaks to old fashioned breakfast diners to speciality biscuit shops, watching Alton's trip made the entire family go and get some "road food"...instead, we wound up at Krispy Kreme, but it was a guilty pleasure he rarely allow ourselves, so it was a real treat. We're seriously considering taking a road trip later this year, to get a little slice of Americana ourselves. ;)
In any case, if you're at all a fan of food, or of "back roads Americana" literature and television in general, you should check out Alton's stuff...you'll be glad you did.
(Oh...I almost forgot to mention that Alton also hosts the new version of "Iron Chef America"...another great show that I'll have to talk about another time...)
Monday, January 21, 2008
To Arms! To Arms!
Or did it?
A few months before Christmas, I conveniently saw this product in the local Target. My jaw dropped, my hands got all sweaty, and I felt a stirring...yes, my wife was looking even more gorgeous than usual that day. But once the shock of my wife's unearthly beauty passed*, I realized that this game, while cosmetically different, was indeed the same game I'd grown up with (though the actual, physical remnants of the game I'm sad to say, ultimately wound up in the hands of my younger brother, thereby sealing its fate. Leaving something with him is like letting a ravenous wolf babysit your barbecue-sauce lathered toddler...it's just asking for trouble). So much "reinventing your childhood" toy marketing has been waged against today's unsuspecting parents recently (G.I. Joe reissues, anyone? Transformers? My Little Pony? He-Man?), but most of it left me unfazed. While I was certainly a fan of those toy lines when I was a youngster (save for My Little Pony, unless they were being marked, tagged and hunted by my Cobra tanks), their reappearance had little overall effect on me. But "Crossbows & Catapults"...even as a boy I'd had obscure tastes, and to think that someone else had also liked this game enough to actually re-issue it was almost like having my entire childhood validated.
Needless to say, the game went onto my Wish List, and -- praise be the In-Laws -- I received every last piece under the Christmas tree!
The game is simple: as I described above, you pretty much set up little plastic castles and destroy them with toy siege weapons. Back in "the day", your armies were the Vikings and the Barbarians (I always played the Barbarians, because the troops looked cooler). Nowawdays, in this Tolkien-savvy world, the armies consist of Humans and Orcs (I like the new armies better, and naturally play the Orcs, since they remind me of myself, gnarly teeth and all). The rules are incredibly simple, and all movement and distance is measured in inches (which reminds just a bit of Warhammer, even if Crossbows & Catapults...or "Battlegrounds", as it's now called...is an infinitely simpler system, as it is designed for kids.)
The best part? Shortly after Christmas, my 5-year-old son and I broke out the game and played it on the table out in the living room which seconds as my desk. We didn't worry too much about the rules (he's 5, come on), but just shot each other's castles with the new, super-cool weapons like the Orc Triple Crossbow, the Trebuchet and the Battering Ram. We had an absolute blast. The game got put away, but then again this weekend we broke it out again, and this time my 13-year old daughter played against my son. Though she may not ever admit it, they both had tons of fun (even if my son got a little..."possessive" of some of the ammunition pieces). What was fun for me was watching them: here were my kids, enjoying something I'd had when I was their age. It brought back good memories...which means it was a present well worth getting. :)
* Give me a break, it's a like a DC 22 Save, and we all know how low my Wisdom score is...
Monday, January 14, 2008
Happy Birthday!
I love you, hon...Happy Birthday!